Friday, January 19, 2007

Smuggler's Blues

There's trouble on the streets tonight, I can feel it in my bones
I had a premonition, that he should not go alone
I knew the gun was loaded, but I didn't think he'd kill
Everything exploded and the blood began to spill

I'm starting to sober up from being very, profoundly drunk.

To understand my situation, the last...three hours, I've been charming, wittiy, and cuddly. And, working through at least two marguritas and a "phaser shot" and a dirty martini.

So baby, here's your ticket, put the suitcase in your hand
Here's a little money now, do it just the way we planned
You be cool for twenty hours and I'll pay you twenty grand

So, Johnny boy is drunk. And running on that odd place between sober and drunk, where my brain doesn't care, and I can write without fear, without soundng or seeming stupid.

I wonder if this is the state that authors aim for, the pure bliss of creation without the Critic behind them.

I'm sorry it went down like this,
And someone had to lose,
It's the nature of the business,
It's the smuggler's blues
Smuggler's blues

I'm starting to come back. Scary thoughts.

Starting to come back to the scary, scared human being that I am, sober and afraid. No wonder alcohol has been called "liquid courage". I'd like to think that the things that I've done, I'd do if I was sober...but I wonder, as my body starts to grow...dense.

The sailors and pilots, the soldiers and the law,
The pay-offs and the rip-offs, and the things nobody saw
No matter if it's heroin, cocaine, or hash,
You've got to carry weapons 'cause you always carry cash
There's lots of shady characters, lots of dirty deals
Every name's an alias in case somebody squeals
It's the lure of easy money, it's got a very strong appeal

Alcohol is easy. So are drugs-it's so easy to escape, to become what I am when I have nothing but reactions and responses-and that when I'm this way, it's excuseable.

Hell, I make my own beer....which I'm sharing tomorrow night.

Perhaps you'd understand it better
Standin' in my shoes
It's the ultimate enticement,
It's the smuggler's blues
Smuggler's blues

But, I wonder-the so very Scottish personality that comes out when I'm in that fuzzy land between drinking and drunk, whom has no fear.

Whom goes up to women that when sober, I'd be scare of. And wouldn't ask out, wouldn't touch, wouldn't ask if they wanted to be touched...

See it in the headlines, you hear it every day
They say they're gonna stop it but it doesn't go away
They move it through Miami, sell it in L.A.
They hide it up in Telluride, I mean it's here to stay
It's propping up the governments in Columbia and Peru,
You ask any DEA man, he'll say, "There's nothin' we can do"
From the office of the President, right down to me and you, me and you

I wonder...and fear. I need to know where this knife's edge is-tomorrow night, I come in kilt and boots, ready to drink and stand and fight without hesitation. To find my dream, that I will come home with someone to earn another tail at con...

It's a losing proposition,
But one you can't refuse
It's the politics of contraband,
It's the smuggler's blues
Smuggler's blues

We wil see.

Saturday comes up. My kilt remains unfolded.

And, if I am happy...I shall win.

We...will see.

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